Guy in Coffee Shop

boit – drinks
fume – smokes
vient de monter – just got into

Guy [male student] in coffee shop. Smokes and drinks coffee. Looks out window into parking lot. Sees beautiful [celebrity] get in his Lamborghini. Says to himself that a beautiful woman just got into his car.

Goes to car. Tells her to get out of his car. Beautiful celebrity tells him, in a romantic voice, to get in the car. He refuses, is very upset.

She drives off or he gets in and they hug or whatever.

I like this script because it is chock full of the really basic elements that make stories work – connections to the daily lives of teens. There is not one sentence in the script that lacks kind of a “forbidden fruit” element to teens.

The opening scene in the coffee shop allows for all sorts of cultural details – the whole thing about coffee in Europe, cigarettes, makes of cars, etc. – all are easily compared and contrasted with U.S.A.

My classes typically produced stories like this one:

There is a kid in a Dunkin’ Donuts smoking four Gauloises cigarettes, drinking un express, casually looking out the huge picture window of the store. He sees, in a parking lot with 7,707 cars in it, a striking woman getting into his extremely small orange Lamborghini.

He smashes through the glass of the coffee shop on a huge horse, itself smoking an incredibly large cigarette in an incredible large mouth. The two take off across the parking lot. The boy angrily confronts the celebrity who responds lovingly in romantic tones, etc. etc. The confrontation between the two makes for extremely rich and humorous dialogue.

We never really ever got past the ensuing love scene in the car, or fistfight, or whatever happened there. You don’t have to “milk” scenes like that – the kids do it for you.

The story teaches at least two grammar points of note: 1) “to have just” done something, and 2) the verbs that describe getting in and out of cars. Moreover, using dialogue in the encounter between the two is great stuff because there is real emotion here, anger from the boy and romance from the celebrity.

It’s just a strong script. I have always agreed with those in TPRS who say that choosing a script or writing one’s own that is relevant to the fears and foibles of American teens makes the asking of the story that much easier. I plan to post other strong scripts on this page. Click on the blog category “story scripts”. They will be useful to you especially if you are not prepared on a certain day with a decent script – all you have to do is just print it and start the story – there is fun in every line.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: